Man to Man Mentoring
Who can I talk to?
Hearing the words, “I think I’m pregnant” from your partner may be confusing and difficult. With your partner’s consent, we encourage men to join their partners for that initial visit to have your questions answered by a male staff member.
What if she got pregnant?
Surprise! She just said “those 3 words”? Not the “I love you” words, the other ones. The “I am pregnant” words. Now what? These 3 words have literally changed your life forever. No matter the next decision your life will never be the same. If you feel overwhelmed, scared, depressed, happy, excited, confused and upset all at the same time it’s ok. That is normal. Let’s talk about your partner for a minute. How is she feeling? Imagine that telling you may be one of the hardest things she has had to do so far. She may be scared about your response, not care about your response or needing your support on what to do next. Each woman is different and faces this in her own way. She needs time and support to process the emotions she is going through and the changes that are about to happen to her body no matter what she chooses to do with the pregnancy. Her body is already and will go through several changes. If she has chosen to include you then realize your support is extremely valuable to her. If you aren’t sure what she needs. Ask her. This isn’t the time to try and guess or read her mind. Clear communication is key.
You may be looking for more information to help her, or you, or both of you on how to understand and handle this unexpected situation. Perhaps this is a great thing. Perhaps you only met up with her one night. Perhaps you have been together for a long time. Perhaps this is an inconvenient unplanned thing that has your mind swirling. Whatever side you find yourself on, we are here to help with information and counseling on options.
Here are some thoughts for consideration that may help you through this:
- Listen. The power of a listening ear as she thinks, reads, researches and processes through all of this is so important. She may want to talk or she might not want to talk at all.
- Stability. Her body and hormones are changing. Her moods may be all over the place. Her food cravings may be all over the map as well. That being said, be solid and steady. Whatever she needs and however she reacts in the moment be a steady listening ear that stays calm as she is processing things.
- Educate yourself. There is a lot to know. Research and get information with her as she is looking at options so that you are educated as well.
- Express your feelings. This isn’t the time to play tough guy. It’s the time to be real and have real conversations. Be open and willing to share how you truly feel about her without pressuring her into any certain outcome.
- Support System. She has her tribe and you need your guys too. Find those mentors, friends, adults, and parents in your life that you can trust. Ask for their advice. They have a little more time on this earth and their perspective might be helpful as you support her and you both talk through your options.